My Statement on Coaching

I have a unique approach to coaching, which is tempered by the fact that I used to be an Ivy League academic AND have served thousands globally as a sought after intuitive consultant. That potent combo of highly honed “intuitive + intellectual” ability features as an alchemical magic at the core of my coaching.

I also have a unique approach to coaching because every client has entirely unique needs from a coach.

Most coaches assume that whatever worked for them on their path to success will work for their clients. And most coaches also assume that what works well for some of their clients will work well for all of their clients. They sell their protocols confidently and aggressively, even though they frankly don’t actually work for many of the clients who sign up with them.

It’s a dirty little secret in the coaching industry that upwards of 90% of client coaching is ineffectual, goes nowhere, and falls entirely flat.

It’s assumed in the coaching industry that the reason for this is that most clients “don’t do the work.” And to some degree that’s true. Not everyone is going to follow through on the aims they set out with. However, many times the coaching is not sufficiently tailored to the individuality of the client, and that is the more honest reason so little progress was made.

It takes two to tango, as the saying goes. However, many coaches actually assume that their client flaked or choked or was trapped in their shadows and blind spots when their coaching protocol didn’t work. They blame the client for their failings as a coach. It doesn’t even occur to them that it was the limitations of their bandwidth and their capabilities—and their being insufficiently present— as a coach that gave rise to the failure and the breakdown of the work.

Some coaches are even angered at the mere suggestion that their protocol might not work for everybody.

It’s common practice to blame the client for not being coachable, for not being teachable, or for being a “unique snowflake.” That refers to someone who is assumed to be gratuitously flexing their hyper-individualism as a defense mechanism and thereby blocking the breakthroughs that would otherwise be possible for them via the coaching protocol being dangled before them.

These people are seen not as having unique coaching needs, but rather as having a pathological need to do things their very own way, in the extreme, and in a way that’s incompatible with the coaching protocol they are being shoe-horned into. The thing is, every person does have their own way, their own path, their own singular essence, and their own needs from a coaching relationship.

My mentoring is tailored to the glorious originality that each individual I work with is imbued with.

I bring a deep seeing eye and a genuine understanding of every individual to my relationship with my clients. This stands in contrast to the state of the coaching industry as a whole, where everyone is expected to adhere to the same trends, templates, and protocols.

The truth is, everyone’s path is different. And is meant to be different. My mentoring places your originality at the core. Your way could never be someone else’s way. But everybody needs guidance and buoying and galvanizing and support as they fulfill their mission and calling. That is what everybody does share in common.

Many coaches will teach you how to “go for it.”

They will give you the tools to flex, with confidence, in the public eye. They will encourage you to be outgoing and proactive and revved up. They will nudge you to invite yourself onto the world’s stage, ready or not. They will prod you to “leap before you’re ready… just go!”

The consequence of these widespread values of “just going for it—right now—and from right where you are” is that many of our most popular “leaders” and cultural “influencers” are profoundly underdeveloped not only as leaders, but as human beings. Many are entirely out of integrity, not even close to walking their talk. Many hunger for the spotlight, driven by a festering core wound of needing to be seen—led by a deep-seated hungering for attention, recognition, validation, and applause.

I instead help you lead from a place of humility and being healthily soul-led… added to immersing you securely in a groove of truly, deeply, thoroughly developing yourself.

I help you to pursue your world-changing mission from a position of having blossomed from the inside out. I will absolutely help you to lead, even if you do so reluctantly because you frankly have zero hunger for the spotlight. You are rather willing to brave the spotlight because to do so is to obey the divine whispers that are audible within you… Because you are more than willing to serve in whatever ways you are truly called to... Because you are listening closely to the calling that emanates from deep within your soul.

For you, it’s truly about heeding your calling, not your shadow desire for the mic.

I will help you up-level the quality of your character. I will help you to walk your talk. I will help you to live your message. I will help you to be aligned with and a match for your mission. I will help you to BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE IN THE WORLD.

No meaningful change comes out of mere proselytizing and telling people what they should be doing. Transformation happens through inspiring people, through igniting people, through infecting people, through showing people a living model of what’s possible. Fine ideas count for little to nothing… if you’re not actually living your life in accordance with those fine ideas of yours.

Many of our most prominent leaders in our society are outright hypocrites. And many of the social movements of our time are infected with the spirit of the very thing they are railing against.

My premium mentoring will thrust you into a healthier, more aware mode of conduct. Together, we will sharpen your many strengths, and we will sharpen them tremendously. And every bit as much, we will look soberly, squarely, and lovingly at your downsides, your weaknesses, and your areas of needed healing.

Yes, I will help you to see, own, and integrate your shadow side.

And that will make all the difference. We will bring to the light the parts of you that you disavow and pretend aren’t there. The addictions and distortions and disintegrations and wounds and hidden agendas that reside within you. In the absence of this shadow work, you simply won’t have the impact you wish to have because people won’t actually trust you.

People might follow you… they might be intrigued by you, impressed by you, dazzled even. They might politely defer to you, cow-towing because of the authority or charisma you are exuding. But they won’t actually agree with you or be “influenced” by you, even if they pretend to be. And they will lack a genuine trust in and respect of you.

Trust and respect come from earning it.

They come from being trustworthy and respectable. They come from being in integrity and residing in a state of genuine, accurate self-awareness. So let’s work together to get you to that trustworthiness and respectability.

Let’s heal you, return you to your soundness and wholeness, and put you on the path to a bona fide coming home to yourself. It will catapult your quality of life… and it will catapult your effectiveness at leading and positively impacting others. It will enable you to make the profound difference only you can make, in the world.